Today I got humorously embarrassed.

All I could blame is myself. I was technically well prepared, however, I was physically worn down. I did manage to get second in the contest but it wasn't a very proud moment. During my speech I'd blatantly said a racist joke. It was purposeful, however, things did not go as planned. There's a saying that what you throw out, comes right back at you. Despite my numerous successful attempts, the crowd today wasn't really the most suitable one to be targeted at. Hence, the moment I triggered my initial untactful statement, the response I got from the audience was literally breath-taking. I was hyper ventilating on the spot and my confidence was crushed. My mind went blank, and I forgot the subsequent lines to smother the fire. It was like stabbing their hearts and leaving the knife there.

So to all those foreign students I'd offended: I really did not mean to be crude and I sincerely apologize for my naiveness. Our relationship started on the wrong foot and I do hope I'll be able to regain back that respect.

Labels: Slices of Life, Toastmasters

The story follows two brothers, Mutta and Hibito Nanba, who, in the summer of 2006, discovered a UFO which flew to the moon. In 2025, as Hibito has managed to become an astronaut set to go to the moon, Mutta has not been so successful in achieving his dream of going to Mars. That is, until he is accepted to join an astronaut training program.

An Anime for those who have lost sight of their dreams in this oppressed society of negativity.

Dedicated to 2 of my best brothers - Jonathan and Berny - for various other relevance.

Labels: Gen Y, Slices of Life, Television

I've slummed back to my usual odd self of bumming around.

Mapled for a night and watching clicknetwork.tv on another. Two unproductive night yet I felt guiltily satisfied. What an irony.

I even made a promotional fan-video of my Maplestory Adventures.

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10151299033649892&set=vb.624424891&type=3&permPage=1


A friend once asked how is it that successful people are able to get out of the comfort zone and stay in the circle where all the magic happens.



Matt's reply was that these successful people are so sick so sick so sick so sick so sick of living comfortable because when they ventured out and truly experience the magic moments, they will never ever ever want to go back to the comfort zone. Because it's the comfort zone where nothing really gets done.

I do agree to a large extend to Matt's wise reply. However, I do feel that there are two other ways an individual could fulfill his/her fantasy.

Firstly, you could expand your's comfort zone so that the two circles could intercept. This can be done through deliberate daily actions, where one is able to turn what seems to be a chore into a subconscious habit. An example of that is brushing one's teeth. However, more often than not, we often pick up the bad habits more easily then the good ones if we aren't discipline enough to do what's right. That would further expand your comfort zone; but away from where the magic happens. So much so that when your comfort zone seems bigger than what you think your magic (or in this case your dreams), you choose to stay in there forever.

I heard from another mentor about how he applies the concept of Newton's three laws of motion in describing how humans behave. But that's another story for another day.

Secondly, is for the magic to come into your comfort zone instead. In everything we do in our comfort zone, it is driven by passion and desire. Humans by nature are explorers, are seekers of truth bounded by what most people would call consciousness. I prefer to call it the guidance of the holy spirit and I Am indeed being very religious here. Because aside from all the goodness of human beings, we are all sinful by nature (that's what the bible speaks, which I couldn't agree less). Humans are genuinely lazy but greedy at the same time. So our very desire to want more by doing less is what makes up our default comfort zone.

Most people do not see that there is another component to this comfort zone - passion. Why do people not complain when they do the things they really love? People like to do things their own way, experimenting on things that they already know is the wrong way to do so, yet think they are very analytic and smart. I myself fall into this category. Is it all about the education that one has been indoctrinated with since young? Absolutely not! Everyone wants to build a beautiful house, but when we were young we are immature and tend to build the foundations fast and hasty. When we grow older we realize that there are gaps in between, but the bricks we have just do not fit the odd holes we created in the walls. It doesn't matter as long as the walls are high and water doesn't enter the house we are fine. So we continue to build further. Then it hit us that, in order to build it tall and strong wall, we have to patch the holes on the ground and what's worst is that we have to build it on solid ground and not on soil or sand. Having spent years of out lives on what we have 'achieved'. Who would want to rebuild everything again from scratch, to either fix the holes or find another solid ground altogether. At this crossroad, people who achieve success are those who humble themselves and aren't afraid to amend their mistakes. In my opinion, the people who are truly happy, are those that see how it's God's grace that sustained them, whether they build it less or built it wrong, their houses are safe from the storms. Successful people who thinks they built their walls with their own hands, have clearly failed to see who was the one who provided the land and the bricks. Will they be happy? No, they just build more flashy houses or give them away to the needy, or help others build their houses. But the very reason none of those are satisfying is because the magic doesn't happen within their own comfort zone - their hearts.

Labels: Christianity, Philosophy, Quotes and Ramblings

Ranked one.

http://www.standard.co.uk/news/education/ucl-beats-oxford-university-in-world-college-rankings-8124725.html

I chanced upon the above article with regards to the world college rankings this year. NUS was ranked 25th to the surprise, pride and joy of many Singaporeans. However, I was elated when I saw that MIT had overthrown the powerhouses of Harvard, Oxford and Cambridge to claim the number 1 position in college rankings. Though SUTD is a collaborated effort of MIT and Singapore, I still feel proud as though I was the one studying enrolled to MIT. Being at the top is one thing, sustaining the ranks is another. I do hope we (they) would be able to defend their titles in years to come. So that the day I do get the student exchange with them through topping the SUTD cohort, that pride and honor will still remain glorious.


Meanwhile, the whole world is counting down to the release of iPhone 5.

Labels: School

I'm posting here again and again that I'm exhausted. I think I really am and am going to crumble any time soon. Hoping some good Samaritan or God-sent angel will pick me up from the ground and embrace me. If she really came, I would take her to be my girlfriend. If he really came, I'll make him my mentor/BFF. haha Maybe that's why no one wants to approach me. Somehow people say I'm a friendly and approachable guy. Others, say I give out this intense aura of sturdiness that ironically intimidates people. So which am I? Whoever thinks I'm the later please.. I'm confessing right now that I'm like those hard shelled-soft core kinda person.

Anyway, phone has been ringing and jerking like mad. I can't even put my mind at ease when I blog. SO Irksome!! ARGHHH I really can't wait for Oct to end. Lord please give me strength.

Anyway! the actual reason for blogging today is not just to spin off some writer's inspiration for my upcoming contest but to proclaim the majestic arrival of my favorite animal to Singapore - Pandas!

Labels: Quotes and Ramblings, Slices of Life

Audience

I'm back again to finish up all my blog posts. Hopefully it would quench the thirst of all my eager readers.
Blogger has provided some really interesting tabs. I'm now able to track the source of my readers. Apparently, they seem to be from the UK and GER! Hello to all of you! It's really encouraging to see that there are still people following this seemingly dead blog. Thank you all my faithful readers! And I refuse to believe that the viewership came from the random spammers on my tag board. Nevertheless, this blog wasn't created for the masses, but for me to sort out my thoughts and possibly refer back to these documents to write an autobiography should I become successful in the future. :P

Just an update on my ordinary life, I'm currently busy with a couple of projects. It's seemingly strange that they are all climbing to its workload's peak and points to a similar purpose in life. Exhausted, life seems to pass by the days. My calendar is already filled till November. More and more people are calling me 'busy-man', should I take that as a compliment or an insult? Personally, I appreciate such comments. It's a way I keep myself in check - if I'd made full use of every bit of my life. In fact, I love it when people call me that, it doesn't show, but it really glows inside. I do pray that I'm still living a God-led life and if so, may he place respectable mentors and teachers in my life. The journey gets lonely when I'm a beater.

Labels: Quotes and Ramblings, Slices of Life

The German philosopher Nietzsche once wrote that, 'he who fights monsters should be careful, lest he becomes a monster; and he who looks long into the abyss should also know that the abyss stares back into him.'


This was a quote found in a book which my mentor had passed to me. It is fascinating how females' sixth sense work. They seem to penetrate through the facade and lies I put up as a form of self defense. Of which is clearly portrayed by a character named Gaara from Naruto. As mentioned, I was clearly exposed by her thoughtless deed. It wasn't all that bad. Besides, I think it's really kind and appropriate to do so - as a friend.

Coming back to the quote, to me, it made a lot of sense. Had I not been shown the mirror, I wouldn't even know what I'd become - a monster. The constant pursuit of self fulfillment has altered my purpose of of living, blinded my vision of tomorrow. I found greater sense of achievement when I get people's approval. Never have I believed that respect is to be given proportional to one's age, neither do I believe the number of years of effort will amount to a proportional yield of success. Hence, the absence of such conformity in certain communities and religion appeal to me greatly. It might have been my way of attaining recognition to boost my low self esteem or that to balance my level of emotional quotient and melancholic nature. Who knows? All I know is that I'm at a juncture in life of deep confusion, wallowing in self-pity where my identity is at stake.

I find that Christian authors do reflect a better understanding and grasp over life's most important issues. Be it life's purpose and meaning or human relationships and desires, they echo the voices of my heart.

As my quest for significance was thwarted by the suffocating surroundings of a home in which I was a virtual prisoner to the mind and will of another, so my thoughts grew bleaker and unhappier, and my questioning constant. We allow the tyranny of urgency of living to overpower us and we forget to ask the really big questions. Too many of us are pursuing the peripheral issues of life without grappling with the truly important ones.

One thing I learnt was that without integrity no true happiness, and no real success is possible. I truly hope my naive trust in certain teachers won't leave me battered and torn by betrayal and regret.

Labels: Quotes and Ramblings